Top Ten Signs it’s NOT Pheasant Hunting Season


I suppose the fact I’m actually taking the time to jot down a “Top Ten List” should be sign #1, but I digress. David Letterman, eat your heart out:

Top Ten Signs it’s NOT Pheasant Hunting Season

10. My beard has been trimmed

9. The faint ringing in my shooter’s ear is no longer noticeable

8. My dog is on a diet

7. I need to start a diet

6. I’ve discovered something other people refer to as “free time”

5. Instead of being “collar wise” the pooch has become “snack smart”

4. I refuse to delete MEATEATER from my DVR – in case I need a quick fix for my hunting withdrawals

3. I no longer come down with “head colds/the flu/pink eye/strep throat/whatever-else-can-get-me-out-of-work” on Fridays

2. Sitting on a cold bucket while staring down a dark hole in hopes of catching tiny fish actually seems like a good way to spend this so called “free time”

[...And drum roll please...]

1. My truck is free of shotgun shells, jerky wrappers, hand warmers and the pungent odor of wet dog

If I may slightly adapt Mud River’s slogan of “Dirty Trucks – Lonely Wives – Happy Dogs,” this is truly the time of “Cleaner Trucks – Annoyed Wives – Confused Dogs.” Next fall certainly feels a long ways away…

- Andrew Vavra, Pheasants Forever's Marketing Specialist